Navigating People-Pleasing: Tips from A Trauma Therapist Near Me

On this week’s episode of Reclaim You, Sarah and Abby dive into the complex world of people-pleasing.

In this blog post, we'll share some of the insights from this week’s episode, highlighting key concepts and practical strategies for overcoming people-pleasing tendencies. Join us as we explore the importance of balancing the needs of others with self-care, the relationship between people-pleasing and authenticity, and how to invite struggles and communicate authentically.

Understanding People-Pleasing

At its core, people-pleasing is the act of prioritizing the needs and desires of others over your own. While this may seem altruistic on the surface, it often comes at the expense of your well-being because it can quickly disconnect you from your own needs.

Balancing Others' Needs and Our Own

Striking a balance between caring for others and caring for ourselves can be difficult. Many people with people-pleasing tendencies find themselves constantly trying to make others happy, ignoring their own needs and desires in the process. This imbalance can lead to resentment, both toward people in your life and toward yourself, which can further disconnect you from relationships and ways of being in the world that are connecting and life enhancing.

People-Pleasing vs. Authenticity

A central theme in the episode is the conflict between people-pleasing and authenticity. Suppressing your true self to cater to others can come at a cost. The journey of reclaiming authenticity can support you in coming home to your desires, your values, your needs and how to not only prioritize those thing, but also how to find balance in your relationships to make space for your wants and needs.

Perfectionism and People-Pleasing

Many people who identify as people pleasers also identify as perfectionist. In this episode, Abby quotes Brene Brown by sharing the distinction between healthy self-improvement and perfectionism driven by external validation. It's essential to recognize the difference between striving for growth that is rooted in self-acceptance and compassion, but doing so solely to gain approval from others can be detrimental to your sense of self.

Self-Care and Community Care

Self-care is not about disregarding others but rather making space for self-expression and self-fulfillment. Honoring your own needs and desires can lead to more authentic connections with others and support you in building community. In this sense, focusing on self-care ultimately benefits not only the individual but also the broader community.

Practical Strategies for Overcoming People-Pleasing

Now that we've explored the concepts discussed in the episode, let's talk about practical strategies for overcoming people-pleasing tendencies:

  1. Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on your own people-pleasing behaviors. When do you find yourself prioritizing others' needs at the expense of your own? Identifying these patterns is the first step toward change.

  2. Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries in your relationships to ensure that you're not constantly sacrificing your own well-being. Communicate your boundaries with kindness and assertiveness.

  3. Practice Self-Care: Make self-care a priority in your life. This can include setting aside time for activities that bring you joy, relaxation, and fulfillment. Remember that caring for yourself is not selfish; it's essential for your mental and emotional health.

  4. Authentic Communication: Challenge yourself to communicate authentically, even when it feels uncomfortable. Express your true thoughts and feelings, rather than defaulting to what you think others want to hear.

  5. Seek Support: Consider seeking support from a therapist or counselor who specializes in trauma therapy in Pennsylvania or childhood trauma therapy near me. Trauma focused therapy can provide a safe space to explore people-pleasing tendencies and where their roots might have come from.

  6. Mindfulness and Yoga: Mindfulness practices and yoga can help you reconnect with your inner self and tune into your needs. These practices promote self-awareness and self-compassion, vital components of overcoming people-pleasing behaviors.

Picture of the Reclaim Therapy team. Reclaim therapy is a group of trauma focused therapists who treat disordered eating and PTSD

Navigating the maze of people-pleasing can be a challenging, but ultimately, a liberating journey.

Recognizing the impact of people-pleasing on our lives, relationships, and recovery from trauma and body image issues is the first step toward lasting change.

By finding a balance between caring for others and self-care, embracing authenticity, and practicing open communication, the grip of people-pleasing can be loosened and rediscovering your true self can be possible.

If you’re struggling with people-pleasing and are hoping to explore its roots and its impact, we would be honored to support you

🧡,

 
The Reclaim Therapy Team's signature. We provide trauma therapy near me and eating disorder therapy in Pennsylvania
 

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Reclaim You- Understanding the Roots of People Pleasing

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A Trauma Therapist Shares How to Cope with Trauma Triggers