Eating Disorder Recovery is The Greatest Act of Self Care
Self-care. It’s benefits are everywhere.
Bubble baths, face masks, cozy blankets.
And sure, those things can be great.
But the deepest, most radical self-care?
It’s not always cute.
Sometimes, self-care looks like eating when your brain is screaming not to.
Sometimes, it looks like challenging the belief that your worth is tied to how small you can make yourself.
Sometimes, it looks like undoing years of trauma that taught you that you don’t deserve to be cared for.
Eating disorder recovery is the greatest act of self-care because it is a reclaiming of your life.
It’s a decision, sometimes made in tiny, often shaky steps, to believe that you are worthy of nourishment, safety, and care.
The Self-Beliefs That Can Keep You Stuck in Recovery
If you’ve struggled with an eating disorder, you know it’s never just about food.
Beneath the behaviors, there are deep, painful beliefs that take root early, often before we even have words to understand them.
I have to be in control at all times, or everything will fall apart.
If I let myself rest, I’m lazy.
If I don’t follow my food rules, I’ll lose control.
My worth is tied to my body size.
Taking up space is dangerous.
I don’t deserve care. I don’t deserve to be nourished.
That last one? That one runs deep.
Because at the heart of so many eating disorders is toxic shame. The belief that you are fundamentally unworthy of love, care, or belonging. That something about you is broken.
That shame? It’s a lie. And it didn’t start with you.
How Trauma Fuels Disordered Eating
If you grew up in an environment where your needs weren’t met, whether through neglect, emotional invalidation, or outright harm, your nervous system adapted to survive.
Your body learned early on that safety wasn’t a guarantee.
Maybe asking for care got you ignored.
Maybe you were shamed for having needs at all.
Maybe love felt conditional, given when you were “good” and taken away when you weren’t.
Maybe the cultural narrative that get’s planted so early on taught you that your body, you, were wrong for existing as is.
When this happens, the nervous system wires itself for protection over connection.
And self-care? It simply doesn’t feel like an option when your body is stuck in survival mode.
Self Care Can Be About Shifting From Survival to Safety
Recovery isn’t just about stopping behaviors.
It’s about shifting the deeper patterns of protection and survival into patterns of self-trust, safety in the body, and care.
And here’s the thing… safety isn’t just an idea. It’s a felt sense in the body.
If you’ve lived in survival mode for years, if your nervous system has been wired for hypervigilance, shutdown, or self denial, then true self-care isn’t about forcing yourself into new behaviors.
It’s about learning to feel safe enough to soften, to eat, to rest, to trust.
How to Find Glimmers of Safety in Eating Disorder Recovery
Safety isn’t all-or-nothing.
It’s not something you either have or don’t have.
It’s something you build in small moments, what trauma expert Deb Dana calls glimmers.
A glimmer is a moment, however brief, where your body feels a little more at ease.
A second of warmth, connection, or even just less tension.
What Might a Glimmer Feel Like?
A deep exhale that feels like a release.
The warmth of the sun on your skin.
The weight of a blanket that helps your body soften.
A bite of food that brings even a moment comfort or pleasure instead of fear.
The sensation of grounding your feet on the floor, your back against a chair.
A moment where you realize you’re even a little but more present, not lost (as much) in anxious thoughts.
The work in recovery isn’t to force safety, it’s to notice it when it’s there, no matter how little you sense it.
How to Bring More Safety Into Recovery
Once you start recognizing these small moments of safety, you can weave them into the parts of recovery that feel hardest.
If Eating Feels Unsafe
Pair meals with something predictable—a warm drink, a favorite TV show, a cozy blanket.
Take a few deep exhales before eating. Remind your body: This is okay. I’m safe.
If Rest Feels Unbearable
If full rest feels overwhelming, try active relaxation—gentle stretching, rocking, slow movement.
Use weighted blankets, warm baths, or soft fabrics to create a felt sense of safety.
If Letting Go of Control Feels Terrifying
Instead of forcing yourself into a radical shift, soften the edges of control. Keep structure, but allow one more flexible moment a day.
Ground yourself when the urge to control spikes. Plant your feet, press your hands against something solid, remind yourself: I am here. I am safe.
If You Feel Undeserving of Care
Challenge the belief that you have to earn nourishment. When “I don’t deserve this” comes up, ask: Says who?
Let yourself receive in small ways—accepting a compliment, letting someone hold the door for you, eating food you actually enjoy.
Eating Disorder Recovery Is Self-Compassion in Action
At its core, recovery is an act of deep self-compassion.
It’s coming back to yourself, as many times as needed, : I deserve to be here. I deserve to eat. I deserve to heal.
And let’s be honest—this kind of self-care isn’t always easy. It won’t always feel good. Some days, it will feel like the hardest thing in the world.
But you are worthy of care, even when you don’t believe it yet.
Because on the other side of all this struggle is something bigger than an eating disorder could ever give you:
Freedom. Peace. A life that is truly yours.
So if nothing else today, take one small step toward that life.
Maybe it’s eating one more bite. Maybe it’s canceling the workout you’re dreading. Maybe it’s reaching out for support.
Whatever it is, you’re so worthy of reclaiming your life from your eating disorder.
🧡,
Looking for an eating disorder therapist in Horsham, PA?
Reclaim Therapy is an eating disorder therapy practice that specializes in trauma-focused eating disorder therapy. We are team of trauma therapists who are passionate about helping people do the deep healing work to free themselves from painful eating disorder behaviors, while doing the work to heal from trauma. We also specialize in treating complex PTSD, PTSD and providing EMDR Therapy in Horsham, PA.
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